I run away at the typewriter. …

The NFL issued a warning earlier this week to ex-Tampa Bay corsairs coach Bruce Arian on his behavior on the sidelines in Sunday’s game against the New Orleans Saints.

My question: What were Arians doing on the sidelines anyway?

I can’t imagine the new coach, Todd Bowles, would want his ex-boss to look over his shoulder during matches, let alone calling in on officials, opposing players and inciting fights.

What exactly happened on Sunday when the arians barked on the corner of Saints Marshon Lattimore, which sparked a skirmish between the two teams, resulting in Tampa Bay star Mike Evans being removed and suspended from the Green Bay Packers game this week.

Arian, who is now the Senior Assistant to Bucs CEO Jason Licht, was aloof with Licht and not upstairs as Bowles says the Saints didn’t provide them with a booth. However, the Saints say they provided seats for Arian and Licht in the press box.

It doesn’t really matter. If the Aryans had to be on the pitch (which he didn’t) he might have distanced himself from the team by standing on the 10 yard line, but instead stood right in the middle of the action in an area reserved for judges, players and coaches. According ESPN.plthen he became very agitated and animated and began to complain about Lattimore after the defensive defender had not been called to interfere with the pass with a pass intended for winger Scotty Miller.

Hmmm, maybe that’s a sign of what really happened out of season.

Remember how the Aryans shocked after last season and it was reported that he was kicked upstairs at the behest of Tom Brady?

On Sunday, he could use a stay at the top, but instead the Ariani showed everyone that he still desperately wanted to prowl the sideline. …

Short things: Mikey likes: Tennessee over Florida at 5pm, UCF over Georgia Tech at 2pm, FSU over Boston College at 8pm, Louisville over USF at 5pm, Miami over Middle Tennessee at 30, Packers over Bucs at 3 Upset Special, Bills over Dolphins at 10, Chargers over Jags at 9, my 401k under the Federal Reserve by $ 20,000 on Wednesday. … Hey, not that I’m bitter ACC chose Charlotte over Orlando as a site for a new headquarters, but let me just say this: You may think you won, Charlotte, until you try to back out of the deal in a few years, but you will be blocked by the ACC ironclad contract! (insert a laughing emoticon!) … There are reports that the NBA may lift the 19-year-old age restriction and pave the way for high school students to return to the league once again. However, de facto Commissioner LeBron James, whose son Bronny is about to graduate from high school, has yet to make an official announcement. … Since Friday is the National White Chocolate Day, let’s take a moment to recall basketball’s stunning brilliance Jason Williams. …

A moment of silence please, Maury Wills has just slipped into the Great Stolen Skybase. Wills, the big 1960s Dodgers shortstop, passed away earlier this week aged 89. He is credited with reviving the stolen base as an MLB strategy. In her obituary, the Associated Press wrote: “His speed made him a constant threat on the base paths and distracted the pitchers even when he wasn’t trying to steal. He carefully studied the blasters and their pick-off moves while he was not at base. As the thrower threw him back into the sack, he became even more determined to steal. Once upon a time, in a game against the New York Mets, Wills was on first base when pitcher Roger Craig sacked 12 consecutive times. On Craig’s next throw, Wills finished second. RIP to the petite player Vin Scully called “The Mouse That Roared.” … Miami Hurricanes quarterback Tyler Van Dyke ruffled the pens of some Canes fans when he said in a recent Barstool Sports interview that he prefers playing street games to home games due to the noisy crowd of students at street matches. Translation: Playing UM home games in a half-empty NFL stadium, 20 miles from campus, has all the atmosphere of the Aamco Transmissions lounge. …

Have you seen where the microphones caught ESPN commentator Dan Orlovsky sneezing and farting at the same time during the Monday Night Football pre-match show in Buffalo? Hey, at least Orlovsky accidentally let gas through the air instead of the deliberate verbal emissions of so many incendiary talking heads these days. Which reminds me of the joke: What’s the difference between Hindenburg and Skip Bayless? One is an airship and the other is a flaming gas bag. … From Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times: “Ernest and Viesia Godek, fishing in Pedder Bay, near Victoria, British Columbia, landed on the magnifying glass when a 750-pound sea lion suddenly jumped on their boat, nearly capsizing. The great lug tried to escape the three orcs. Hey, that reminds me of another joke: What did a seal with one fin say the orc? “If the seal is broken, don’t eat it.” …

Minnesota Timberwolves star Anthony Edwards was fined $ 40,000 for using offensive anti-gay language on social media. Good thing he didn’t say anything bad about China otherwise he would have been removed from the league faster than Phoenix Suns owner Robert Sarver. … I saw where in Arizona he fired head coach Herm Edwards after losing to East Michigan last week. Edwards, when he coached the New York Jets, was famous: “You play to win the game!” Unfortunately, Edwards has lost too many matches as evidenced by his career record of 80-94. … Steelers coach Mike Tomlin, asked to rate Jaylen Warren’s first game rookie, “He didn’t urinate man – this is a great place to start.” … Have you seen where UCF’s athletics director Terry Mohajir tweeted to former radio pioneer Paul Harvey earlier this week? Coming soon Mohajir will publish his list of 5 favorite media characters: (1) Paul Harvey. (2) Walter Cronkite. (3) Edward R. Murrow. (4) Grantland Rice. (5) Mel Allen. …

Last word: RJ Currie with SportsDeke.plon Forbes, ranking the Knicks as the NBA’s most valuable team at $ 5.8 billion: “Who would have thought a laughing stock could be so much worth?”

Email me at mbianchi@orlandosentinel.com. Call me on Twitter @BianchiWrites and listen to my Open Mike radio show daily from 6am to 9am on FM 96.9 and AM 740.

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