A woman has been slammed online for telling her husband that he is treating his niece, who lives with him, separately from their biological children.
The father took to Reddit under the username toddlernightmare to explain his family dynamic, saying he has an 8-year-old and 2-year-old son.
The man and his wife, both in their early 30s, recently adopted their 5-year-old niece, the daughter of his wife’s sister, and it looks like she may live permanently.
The stay-at-home father explained that his wife went back to work because she earns more, and they were happy with the dynamics of the household.
But it raised its head in the bedtime controversy, as Dad put it: “Her niece came to live with us eight months ago, and it looks like she’ll be around for longer, maybe even permanently.
“That isna [is a] Sweet girl, but she was raised by drug addicts, so her routine was basically non-existent. I created a solid routine for him in my home (like work, bedtime schedule etc) and he has adjusted really well.
“My wife works at 8-5. The kids wake up at 7 then my wife drives her to school at 8 and I’m at home with the other two. 8 years old at 8, 5 years old at 7:30 pm at 7 pm and 2 years at 7 pm”
His wife said that his niece wanted to take his bedtime till 8 pm, but the father refused, saying that the elder son slept later as he had more work to do.
He continued: “My wife got really p***** on me and said I was mistreating her niece because she’s not mine. I said it was ridiculous. She told me that We may adopt him someday and I need to treat him like me.
“I told her I treat her like myself and have a regular sleep schedule that I maintain for all my kids, not that 8yro can agree to later or skip a 2yro nap because she hates sleep.
“He called me a biased ‘dad’ and an AH for putting my kids before my nieces. I told him that if I’m such a terrible father, he’s welcome to be a SAHM and deal with kids, While I go to work. She was really hurt.”
newsweek Kid reached out to Nightmare for comment.
post that can be read HereReceived over 10,000 upvotes and comments, as people criticized his wife being ripped off.
Many weighed in, as Raging_Carot47 said: “It might help to remind your wife of this week that you’re treating your niece the same way you treat yourself? (If you’ve already If not, of course).”
Poo_explosion wrote: “Why is your wife ignoring the fact that their bedtime is mostly/entirely based on age?”
Blasle explained: “Plus he’s treating her exactly like himself. She’s 5 years old, another 8 years old, goes to bed in the period 5 years ago. NTA.”
Riley_Stenhouse thought: “If my partner accuses me of something so obviously disgusting as ill-treating the children in your care, I will insist on marriage counseling because they are not yours.”
The chart below, provided by statistaShows how much Americans sleep.
This_Cauliflower1986 commented: “NTA but your wife is. She’s trying to make decisions based on developmental needs in an age about favoritism. It’s not bias and it’s that simple. Is that about her bias? I can or want to express my concern. Avoid your actions?”
Western-Hole asked: “NTA. I don’t know what your wife’s problem is, but a five-year-old doesn’t need to live now.”
Whereas Crawdad29 said: “NTA. You’re setting the appropriate schedule for the kids. The little ones always push. Parents are fast into routines. Your wife is out of line.”
Bedtime for a 5-year-old is in line with recommendations from the National Sleep Foundation, which say that pre-schoolers should get between 10 and 13 hours of rest.
This drops to nine and 11 hours for school-age children, and it is even lower for teens who are advised to get eight to 10 hours of sleep.
This is in contrast to newborns who must sleep between 14 and 17 hours, infants need to close their eyes between 12 and 15 hours, and it is recommended that babies should rest between 11 and 14 hours.